I no longer believe

Any promise of speed makes a fan in me. So, when the self service checkouts began popping up all over I was instantly touting their praises. I'd walk up to the overcrowded lines, look at all the unenlightened shoppers, briefly pity their plight then ninja into the SSC line. Minutes later my receit would spit out and I'd be exiting the store catching the sad glances of the shoppers left behind. Why can't they just believe. . . I no longer believe. I realize you can't base your beliefs on one bad experience but you can actually, people do everyday, especially as it applies to shopping. Here's what happened.

I had just finished shopping in a place I usually avoid due to ethical reasons and/or masses of people and I was walking up to the checkout lines when I spotted them. I had already been shopping twice as long as I planned and my small cart was bursting. Why do we use small carts when we know they're too small. Anyways, I entered the no line laughing hautily to my brother in law and wife. Angie began scanning the items as if she was being timed and I kept careful eye on the clock sensing a record was imminent. Then came the voice. "Please wait for assistance." What? Who said that? "Please wait for assistance." Wait? In the SSC? Panic began to set in. Just keep scanning stuff I blurted out. We have to do something. But our something didn't work. So we stood. That's when the arguing began.

Just cancel and start again. You can't do that. Well push that button then. Do you even know what that button does? Well, scan more stuff at least. It won't let me. Well forget this then, lets just take our stuff to the unenligtened tills. No, we only have a couple things left to scan. Yeah, but we could be standing here all day. Oh wait, a blue smock, someone's coming. What, they're just staring, like, not my problem I'm on my break. Oh, there's another, what? She's just staring at us too, staring!!!! And so there we stood. The unenlightened. Waiting.

10 pitying glances later a human being flashed a card and minutes after that we were on our way. Phew. Flashes of the movie AI appeared and I secretly prayed machines would never take over the world. Sure they're faster but. . .. humans are great, right, even in blue smock.

John

P.S. I was snuggling with Lex in bed this morning when she asked "Dad, what do you want to be when you grow up?" I celebrated thinking "she thinks I'm young." And then she continued, "yeah, dad, you really need to get a job." ha ha. I'm working on it.